Back Into The Groove
I will start by offering my lamentations for the three or four people who actually read anything I write on a regular basis. This blog will simply be a level set of everything that has taken place in my life the last few weeks, which will explain the lack of entries, as well as what I’ll prioritize in the weeks and months to come.
I’ll start by saying that the last entry I produced was an election prediction. I must say that it was pretty much a perfect prediction other than one state, but competing for my attention that whole day was the fact that my grandmother was not doing well. A few phone calls on Tuesday evening were indicators that I should stay tuned for the inevitable.The next morning, the inevitable occurred–or I should say that the inevitable news was relayed to me. Some time on Tuesday night, she had passed on.
She was an amazing person. She was humble, grounded, strong in her Catholic faith, and more intelligent and talented musically than she ever let on. Her prioritization of her family took precedent for her over any talent she had though, and the example she set was one we’d all be wise to follow in almost every way.
So the following week and change was spent planning and carrying out memorial services (viewing, funeral, wake). It was an opportunity to check in on her children as well, as my brother and I were in the area for once. Neither of us currently live there. This coincided with what was going to be a trip to the area to run a 10k event over the Chesapeake Bay Bridge. This I was still able to complete, and I’m glad I did.
As for the funeral, my brother and I were sort of thrown into the fire and needed to carry out everything on the fly. It wasn’t something we minded doing, but it did add to the whirlwind of the week. All of this I had to balance with checking in with work, making sure my family was alright, as well as my immediate family.
I’m happy to return home and resume whatever normal is, which is probably a bizarre definition compared to how must would describe it.
I should probably write a little on what it all means to me though, as the timing of everything was memorable through my lens.
Like almost everyone, I was a little caught up in the tension around the Election. Going into Tuesday, I was useless in most ways. I was following social media coverage, early vote totals, and eventual results as they came in. I could tell pretty early how everything was trending and decided to call my uncle, my grandmother’s caretaker for the last year-plus.
I slept on the couch Tuesday night, and probably for a total of four hours. When I awoke, the pillar light at the front of my driveway was illuminated. To backtrack, this pillar light had been non-functional for years. Before it went dark for good, it looked completely decrepit. One light out of the three functioned, and it barely functioned. I had never addressed it once it went out. On Wednesday morning, all three of the lights were shining and shining brightly. People can call me crazy, but I absolutely believed it was a sign from my grandmother that she was on her way to eternity, and it was only an hour later I received a phone call saying she had passed on. I already knew.
It was a reminder of what mattered. This stupid bullshit on television was trivial in the grand scheme of life. I needed this reminder to help me transition from the idiocy of election season (though some are somehow still counting or manufacturing votes weeks later). Tribalism inhibits our abilities to reach our full potential. We’re foolish not to build connections with all kinds. Building these bridges remind us of the human in all of us, even if we struggle to see it through these clouds that we ourselves have seeded.
The occurrence quickly put my life into a healthier perspective. It’s time for me to get back to it. I wish our newly elected leaders well, and I hope they succeed. I will have objective commentary as events take place, but I will always be mindful to maintain that boundary between those events and myself as a human.
Speaking of getting back to it, I have to finish getting my first book into print. Stay tuned on that end. I’m also heavy into editing my second book, and that will resume this week (as I write this). As for the next month or two, the holidays are upon us. It’s a fun and busy time for me. If I can figure out how to incorporate it, I will do some video coverage of me putting my wigilia dinner together. At the very least, I’m excited about blogging on what wigilia actually is, as many probably don’t know. I learned much of it from my late grandmother, who was as Polish as Polish gets. Same goes for Seven Fishes though, as I live in a predominantly Italian area and am exposed to it every year. This is probably also a good opportunity to dive into how different cultures I’ve run into in my life celebrate Christmas.
Hell, what’s different about my Thanksgiving dinner table compared to most others (I do incorporate some different items, as the standard shit bores me to tears)?
Anyway, I’m looking forward to resuming standard ops. The silver lining of a tragedy is that it often brings loved ones together who aren’t able to see each other often enough. I valued that time. I grew from it, and I think we all did. It’s time for steam ahead once again though. Blessings. -P.K.